Tis The Season....

It's that time of year when....

Christmas songs and carols play on the radio from the 1st of December onwards and you're sick of them by the 10th of December.

TV channels start showing the Christmas movies.

It's not about the Christmas No1 but which company does the best Christmas advert.

You open and eat ALL the advent calendar chocolates on day one.

You forget to open the advent calendar and eat all the chocolates at the end of December.

You wait to see who in the street gets their decorations up first before you do yours. Unless it's the people who put them up on 1st November. They don't count.

The Christmas tree goes up and looks like you've sneezed the decorations over it.

No-one can remember whose turn it is to put the angel on the top of the tree so a fight ensues.

The trusty Argos catalogue returns to the house. It's just not the same on-line and the kids can't put rings around what they want.

The darling children have written their wish lists. You go shopping then convince them they wont get what they want so well  they change their minds.

You are all hot and bothered in the shops trying to track down the last "must have" toy of the year without losing your shit or paying 1500% over the odds on eBay.

Some smug bitch likes to tell everyone they were all shopped and wrapped by August 1st.

You take a picture of the Christmas Radio Times / TV Times next to your highlighter pen.

You record a load of shit and still haven't watched it by Easter.

You run out of sticky tape and/or wrapping paper.

You forget someones Christmas birthday.

You live on tenterhooks that the 10yo wont tell the 6yo Father Christmas isn't real in a fit of temper.

The kids are getting so excited by the preparations at school they can't sleep for the whole of December.

You hunt down the last King/donkey/sheep/camel/Mary/Joseph costume in the universe.

You go to the School play knowing you can't actually see your child in their costume.

You go to the school Christmas Fayre and spend more than the country's national debt and still come home with a bottle of cola from the tombola and a home-made jar of sweets.

You spend hours trying to remember the names of everyone in the class so the kids can write their Christmas cards... which take weeks. Start in the summer.

You feel like a pariah if you don't put into the teachers collection.

You feel like a pariah if you go rogue and your kids make their own present for the teacher.

You buy stupid amounts of chocolates and biscuits then eat them before Christmas arrives.

When it's over it's a relief, then you look forward to next year!

We've Clung On To The Age Of Innocence.. kind of.

Yesterday in the car on the way home, the nine year old turned to face me and said. "I want to ask you a question and I want you to be honest with me"  It's very odd when you hear yourself being repeated.

His question was:

Does Father Christmas buy the presents or do you?

Just two days prior to this MrM and I had had this conversation regarding the nine year old. Did he still believe or not?  I thought yes, hes generally quite young natured and naive. We've always told the children that as Father Christmas has so many children to look after, we have to save money to help him get all the presents. 

The nine year old has got an X-Box, however trying to find suitable games on an X-Box is a mission.  Apparently all his friends are playing Call of Duty (rated 18) and  HALO (rated 16).  I've told him that they aren't age appropriate and he has to wait until his older.  I'll let him watch age 12 films but I have to check them first. The current run of Marvel films are fantastic.  We share a Google Play account so I can make sure no inappropriate games are being downloaded and no money is being splashed out. You hear these horror stories where children have wracked up £1,000's of pounds worth of bills downloading in-app games.  

He's never been sure about the tooth fairy although he likes to get money under his pillow and he's never believed in the Easter Bunny and I've never promoted it. 

I also don't want him spoiling it for the five year old. At the moment they don't have the greatest relationship, it's all one-upmanship and he would love having the power of knowing something she didn't and dropping that bomb on her. She's a smart cookie and I'm sure will suss it before the age of nine but until then I want to keep her as young as I possibly can too.

So what did I do with that loaded question?

I lied through my back teeth to keep him believing!